Blogging Away Debt

Redefining the Parent/Child Relationship

The call outs on my post about my kids beginning to migrate were SPOT ON! And as I’ve heard about their plans, I’ve had the same fears. Can I set better boundaries? Be consistent in saying NO or rather, not offering financial help? And essentially reset, the relationship as a parent with now all adult, independent children?

First off, I want to be very clear. The issue is with me. My kids do not ask me for help very often. And when they do, it’s been minimal and typically temporary. They are all doing so well at being independent.

The problem is ME.

And this has always been the case. I finally think I see clearly. Not perfectly for sure, but clearly.

My challenge is how do I reset the expectations with my kids? And I’m just writing out loud here the thoughts going through my head.

How do I invite them to a meal out or to meet up without them expecting me to pay for them? Like what words do you use? How do I set that as the general experience and when I can or want to treat, make that the exception?
How do I stop leading with my heart? Or my “I want to do this” for whomever? Like when they mention something and I want to provide it. This has been a huge one during their childhood. But I’m doing better, much better with the distance.
How do I invite them on a trip or adventure, setting the expectation of them covering their own way? And how do I handle it if one or another can’t do it financially? Cancel the whole thing or just going with those who can?

These are just a few of the thoughts I am having.

And as much as I’m enjoying the Dave Ramsey class, my group has no other later in life people, parents, no other empty nesters in it, so I don’t feel like they are in a place to provide experienced guidance or feedback. Does that make sense?

Small Win – Valentines

I was really proud of myself as Valentines came around. Instead of going overboard shipping boxes of even small things, I bought them each a card and wrote a personal love note. No candy, no stuff, no gift card. Just a heartfelt card. I know that seems stupid or like “duh” to most people here. But, wow, that was a huge thing for me to not do anything else. Next up Easter.

Hope’s Debt Update – February, 2026

by Hope

Well, I’m not where I want to be, where I planned to be, but I am further than I was.

Current student loan balance (as of 2/23/26) is $15,255.65.

Income dropped unexpectedly as one of my clients took an early retirement once he qualified for disability. I’ve gotten no hours for the last two months. Our contract still stands, but he’s backed way off.

My other contracts continue as they have, but this one was the bulk of my income in Q4 and this drop was completely unexpected.

Thankfully, this hasn’t affected anything except my debt payoff. I’ve not accrued any more debt. still going cash only, but I’m also being really cautious until I replace the income. Especially since I am in Q1 of a new business launch.

What am I doing about that?

I’m looking for new work – both W2 and 1099. I continue to apply for projects via Upwork. And recently joined a couple of local, in person business networking groups (free). I attended my first two meet ups this past Friday. In addition, I’ve been applying for remote only W2 positions, but am being very selective on that as caretaking for my parents in the priority still.

I’m not in the whoa is me state that I’ve been in in the past when work fell through, but I am in a rebuilding phase of my primary business contracts/projects again. The last year has been really, really solid though so I’m in a good place.

New Business Update

As I am launching my new business, which is not taking much or really any money at this point, just lots of time; I am just hoarding my income paying bare minimums on everything. I’m anticipating breaking even on the money invested in this new venture near the end of Q2 and hopefully *crossing my fingers, will begin seeing some profits in Q3. But that will all be re-invested. It’s really running on a skeleton tech stack and to take it to the next level, I’ll have to invest a little more money. But getting through this first year as lean as possible to prove proof of concept.

And long term, this should become relatively passive. Goals – at least!