by Claire
$11,889.19 in my work 401K and an additional $10,288.31 in Restricted Stock. I will be vested in February 2013. This 401K is the only investment account I am currently adding to with a 4% withholding (reminder: this is a recent increase from 3% after a raise kicked in so I wasn’t accustomed to getting the money yet so it was easier to add to savings.) My company uses Fidelity and I spent some time exploring their website and learned some basic info. I’m invested in a “life plan” Vanguard that is designed to grow gradually more conservative as I move toward retirment. I used 2035 as my retirement date which would put me at age 63. I think I was in the default fund and it was too conservative for my current age. I don’t know for certain right now but if memory serves me correctly, my husband’s 401K sits in the same range.
I also used a couple of retirement calculators to see where we are at and what we need to do in order to get where we want to be by age 60. While certainly not in a fantabulous position, we also aren’t destitute. With the debt payments decreasing in the next couple of years I would hope that by retirement we are talking about living expenses, medical expenses (which I know have got to be horrendous), housing and basic living stuff…maybe we won’t need to die within 18 months of retirement. Funny timing as I was doing these calculations today, my husband was dining at what he did not know was a “Senior Friendly” restaurant on his current business trip. I’m sure as he enjoyed what he described as exceptionally bland food…surrounded by the senior crowd…he really wanted to see a text from his wife about retirement! 🙂
Anyway, I’ve gathered all the retirement numbers and that prompted me to get things moving on the account transfers and such so that’s a plus to posting this info. I really hate this stuff–like almost rather eat a big bug instead of look at and thinking about my retirement accounts. Sigh. I know it is a reality but it is like I have a teflon brain for getting this! In some ways I think it is simply a mental roadblock that will eventually lift on its own…other times I am pretty sure I will never understand investing. Maybe there’s a community education course I can look into to help–b/c not even reading books on my own is doing it! This reminds me of high school geometry when even the very patient teacher finally just gave me a D to get me out of her class! My only D ever and she was so good about telling me she knew I was working so hard and giving it all I had…but…it was time for me to go! Ah…good times!
Born and raised in Texas. I’ve at least driven through every state in the US courtesy of a roadtrip loving Dad.
I’m single with two children and a good parenting relationship with their father.
I am a “life is just half full of funny” kinda gal. Humor is my saving grace and I am thankful for it every single day. I have a strong Catholic faith and am thankful for that foundation.
I read a lot for a living but still enjoy a good book. I love biographies but in recent years have found the need for fun fictional books–sadly, for a long time I just didn’t enjoy fiction!
I love live theatre of any kind–from local productions to Broadway.
I love to scrapbook and pride myself in my kids’ albums.
I love being a mom but also love my career. I’m blessed to have found a balance allowing me to be at everything my kids need and want me to be at–while also having a career.
Favorite Quotes: Well behaved women rarely make history.
Behold the turtle. He makes progress only when he sticks his neck out. -James Bryant Conant
For a clearer picture…
$40,520.17 in 401K/mutual funds
$40,000.00 (approx) in husband’s 401K
$1,000.00 IRA
____________________________________
$81,520.17
$10,000+ in 529
Attitudes like yours are why women are consistently taken advantage of in financial transactions. It should be clear from your divorce that a husband cannot be relied on to take care of you. Only you can look out for you. Time to grow up and learn about money.
Well, that’s not very nice! Attitudes like yours are misguided. Maybe you had an ugly divorce or something–I don’t know. I didn’t rely on my first husband to take care of me–neither one of us knew what we were doing! We talk about it now–that we simply did not know. And I know I am not alone on this issue–once again just one of the few brave enough to say it all out loud. I think we all have strengths and weaknesses…and this is a weakness of mine that I recognize and take full responsibility for. I think that, in itself, establishes my maturity about it all.
Just another web bully…so sad. Claire – don’t pay people like that any mind…they just love the reaction. You rock an soon your finances will too!
Another Reader, “Attitudes like yours”… really? That was uncalled for. Her attitude in this post is one of wanting to learn and knowing, realizing and admitting that she doesn’t know enough about it. Gee whiz. Give the girl a break.
Claire, the fact that you ARE taking steps to learn about retirement and investing means that you are headed in the right direction. Every bit of knowledge helps. My employer is offering several different sessions on retirement this week and I’ve been trying to take advantage of as many as possible. I do admit that I didn’t sign up for the investing one – mainly because I just don’t have the extra money right now to invest with. But, I’ll get there.
Thanks for the support Alice. While I am definitely not just looking to hear what I want to hear–I certainly have an expectation that I not be faced with outright ugliness. So many comments are not “rah rah Claire” but have a way of scolding me without belitting me and THAT is the key. This is emotional intelligence and it cannot be discounted! I have seen more careers stall (and personal relationships fail) b/c people like Another just don’t get this component. It is a skill that relatively few in this world have and it is absolutely threatening to those who don’t have it–and, I believe, it leads to bitter angry people that only want to make others miserable!
I do not care for critical comments here! Walk in Claire’s shoes–would you be prepared to put yourself on display so bravely?
Thanks Chantal–and apparently not since Another Reader is alarmed that I shared at all! 🙂
“I really hate this stuff–like almost rather eat a big bug instead of look at and thinking about my retirement accounts.”
This is the underlying attitude and belief I find objectionable. It undermines your ability to move forward and gets you into the unproductive thought mode of “Maybe there’s a community education course I can look into to help–b/c not even reading books on my own is doing it!” “Maybe” and “look into” are not action words.
How about “I’m going to sign up today for every investment seminar my employer’s 401k provider offers and also those free seminars at my discount broker” instead? Try your local Fidelity or Schwab office, they both offer lots of seminars.
Math and money anxiety are excuses for girls and women not to achieve. Time for some tough love here.
Tough love is different than being outright rude and ugly. There’s no call for that here — she’s working on it — she said she’s working on learning it. It isn’t going to happen in a day — especially when she’s a busy professional with a large family! If you find it so objectionable, then don’t subject yourself to it!
We are talking about someone with $100,000 in debt and no savings. She is only a couple of paychecks away from default and bankruptcy. Being a busy professional with a large family does not change this. It is not an excuse for not moving forward at top speed.
This is a financial emergency. Emergency wake-up calls ARE rude. They have to be, to get the recipient up and out of danger.
Like in any situation, delivery does make a difference. The majority of people are not going to respond well to advice given in an ugly tone—period. It doesn’t work with anyone or anything–from pets to kids to family to spouses to friends to strangers. Totally ineffective. In fact, it loses all credibility when done in the manner you have chosen to present and that you stand by. While I don’t know a lot about finances, I do know a lot about human nature and emotional intelligence. Not only do I have formal training via my education but my profession is all about information delivery and conveyance…there are those of us who are good at it and are rewarded accordingly. Then there are those like yourself who enter a room with a verbal machete–and in the end you don’t get very far.
You have hit the nail on the head, Claire! For what it’s worth, I’m a young 20-something female that doesn’t know the first thing about investing. I’ve been educating myself for about the last 6 months, and I’ve literally read the same information over, and over, and over again. It’s FINALLY starting to sink in and make sense. It takes a while to get there, but don’t give up, one day you will say “Oh! So THAT’S what a mutual fund is!” just like I did, and it will make sense. I promise!
Math and money anxiety is not only a women’s problem. Men have difficulty with money as well.
One’s relationship with money is not simple. Money is complicated. One has spending, saving, investing and laws governing it. It takes time to achieve a good balance even then mistakes can be made along the way . . .
I’m sorry but who gave YOU the right to give Clare “tough love”? You are a reader of a blog. Not her guidance counselor, not her priest, not her parent.
This is a forum for learning from one another but learning can’t and won’t take place when you come across as condescending and rude. For you to comment on something as deeply perosnal as a divorce and leverage it as a weapon to make a point isn’t just rude — it’s a personal attack and shows your character. Perhaps instead of following a financial blog you should instead look for a political blog if that’s your style of helping.
Brian—so right on with the political blog point. Thanks!
When I was 23 I bought a Financial Planning for Dummies book. I took my time and read thru it all. It wasn’t extremely in depth, but it did give me a lot of basics and from there I was able to move forward. Am I doing super great now…no not really. But I get better with every passing year. I think you have to be a certain kind of person to really enjoy investing. Otherwise, it’s kinda…mind numbing! LOL Anyways, you might look and see if your library has something similar to the book I got. It might help get you started.
Excellent suggestion! Get a couple of these books and read them thoroughly. Since you work for an insurance company, many of your co-workers should be financially savvy. Ask them how they got started in investing. It’s a great lunch topic. You will get a lot of different opinions, but between the books and the conversations, you will become more familiar with the concepts and the jargon.
Solving your larger problem with money is going to take a multi-pronged approanch. You are going from being a mindless spender to being a thoughtful saver, investor and planner. Absorbing as much knowledge as possible as quickly as possible will make the transformation faster and less painful.
But do keep in mind that just because they’ve been investing longer than you won’t mean that they are better at it than you! Or that what they do will work for you!
Also, I forgot what part of the company you work in, but not everyone in a financial services company actually know everything about financing…
EXACTLY Shannon! That’s what I should have said instead of bug eating being preferred–that it is mind numbing and I can think of about 100 other things that I’d prefer. This doesn’t mean I don’t recognize the importance and definitely doesn’t mean that I am waiting for a man to come fix the problem for me…just that I’m not calling it fun! Thanks.
Wow – you’re one year younger than me!! For some reason I thought you were a little older than me… Maybe because, other than your finances, you’re much more “together” than I am 😉 At the very least your job sounds more glamourous than mine.
Anyway, glad to see you’re invested in the target retirement fund – that will help simplify things for you. I was very concerned that you didn’t have enough for retirement, but 1. I thought you were older than me, and 2. I forgot the cost of living in San Antonio is most likely much less than in Boston!
Definitely consider getting a Personal Finance for Dummies book, or a similar book. And the adult education centers up here offer personal finance classes, so you might be able to go to one where you live, similar to the couponing class you attended 🙂 Also, keep in mind that you don’t need to learn all there is to know about investing all at once. Try to take it in in small bits.
Anyway, once you’ve paid off your debt, I do strongly recommend that you ramp up your retirement savings
When I was first learning about investing, I found MorningStar’s free “Investing Classroom” to be very helpful. The “classes” are short articles followed by a few questions, and then the answers.
http://www.morningstar.com/cover/Classroom.html
Careful here! Discussing your personal financial situation, good or bad, at the office is a “never do”. There are just too many ways the information could be misused either accidentally or intentionally (“she really can AFFORD to get along without a raise” “someone else NEEDS it more” “she’s a RISK to the company because of her EXCESSIVE DEBT”). With a little research, I think you will be able to find plenty of short courses, discussions, videos, meetings, books or whatever fits into your schedule to enhance your knowledge without “taking it to the office.”
Talking about investing is different than talking about debt. I agree with you about management’s likely perception of this much debt and I’m surprised Claire decided to go public with it. Casually asking people you know and respect at work about which investment options they prefer in the 401k or whether they like 529 plans as savings vehicles for the kids’ college over lunch is different.
I found “Another Reader” comment extremely sexist! Claire never said she couldn’t understand investing because she’s a GIRL – she just said she didn’t understand it….sheesh! Time to let go of that chip on your shoulder.
Claire – I would suggest that you take your time and not rush into anything you don’t understand. Educate yourself until you are comfortable making any changes. Good luck!
Uh no. I’m not asking co-workers about their finances. That’s crossing a line at the workplace and putting people in a very awkward position. I’m happy to discuss with people who approach me but I’d never open that up.
Thanks for this tip Petunia! Going to check that link out now.
Claire – A lot of my comments have been along the lines of “this stuff is going to take time – one bite at a time” kind of comments.
On the investments, all you really need to know is to limit fees. (Well, that and don’t buy high and sell low – just regularly invest like with a 401k). Investing in life cycle type funds is GREAT. Set it and forget it – you can revisit this later. It seems to me that getting out of debt and becoming an investment guru overnight it not going to happen. I’d try to get my money 100% into Target type funds (of the low cost variety) in the interim. Start to educate yourself, but it will take time. At least in the target date funds your money will be working for you while you figure it out.
FWIW, “Another Reader” has basically told me I was a moron multiple times. “Another Reader” is the only commenter ever that I put on “ignore” to the point I delete his comments without even reading them. I am personally in a very good financial position – he doesn’t have anything nice to say about anybody. I share because rather than read his nastiness on every blog I Read, I’d prefer if people ignore the big bully. Ignore, delete, and he will go away. (& yes, he is 100% just a troll).
The only blogger that to my knowledge has ever deleted my comments is this one:
http://monkeymama.savingadvice.com/
The blog describes a financial way of life diametrically opposed to Claire’s historical approach and is very readable. The writer has done an excellent job of managing her family’s finances on one income in a high cost of living area (Sacramento). She has no debt except a mortgage and she has faced some very expensive and scary health issues over the last few years.
However, she is very critical of her accounting clients with debt. A little of the pot-kettle thing going on here I think. She deletes comments that suggest different ways of doing things, such as refinancing a mortgage or leveraging capital. She deletes her own posts from time to time as well.
Claire and Alexandria have put themselves on public display by blogging. Blogging reaches a broad and diverse audience. One reason for blogging is accountability for your actions. Not every reaction to yout actions is going to be positive or supportive. Claire’s words in her original post were not action words. I responded accordingly.
Rebecca was “gazelle intense” in her approach to her debt. Her organized and determined attack on her debt was fascinating to follow and she received a lot of support in her fight. She got her share of suggestions and advice. She read them and responded where she saw fit. The blog was a great read during her tenure.
If I woke up with $100,000 in consumer debt and a second marriage with a blended family, I would be even more “gazelle intense” than Rebecca in attacking the debt. That debt would be a threat to my family’s security and I would want it paid as soon as I could make it happen. To me, the debt is an emergency that needs to be addressed right now. The yoga approach of gradual change would not work for me if I found myself in Claire’s shoes.
I have no grudge against either of these bloggers and I wish the best to both of them. However, this blog seems to be devolving into patting Claire on the back every time she makes a small step forward. Sadly, there is also a lot of marginal financial advice being given. If the trend continues, the blog will become boring and without useful content. I hope that doen’t happen.
Unless you haven’t noticed – the blogs name is Blogging Away Debt. She took this position to do just that. It’s a documentation of her journey from having tons of debt to being debt free. She is learning lots of new things. I don’t know of anyone who is just coming by to say ‘good job’ just to pat her on the back. A little encouragement never hurt anyone. Even a little bit of reprimanding can help in the right situation, but the tone and attitude behind it is important as well.
If this blog were “Personal Finance for the Masses”, then you may have a better point.
Ha! Ha! This made me laugh! Thanks Alice!
Since you seem to be such an avid reader of financial blogs, where can I find your blog so that I can dissect your approach and offer harsh criticism? As earlier commentators have posted, it’s all about the approach and yours is totally uncalled for.
The part I find intriguing is your second paragraph in which you state “If I woke up with $100,000 in consumer debt and a second marriage with a blended family, I would be even more “gazelle intense” than Rebecca in attacking the debt.” Emphasis on the word ~IF~. You aren’t Claire and you’re not Rebecca. You would do well to remember that. It’s easy to say how someone SHOULD do something. Unless you have the exact same life experiences (and I doubt you do) then you can’t be judge, jury and executioner. Claire isn’t adverse to feedback. She’s demonstrated that. She is (as we all are) adverse to rudeness.
Further, it’s insulting to the readers of the this blog to state that “marginal advice” is being given. Are you Susie Orman? I don’t think so.
Lastly, I find it interesting that you choose to mask yourself as a “Another Reader”. Be brave. For someone so full on insight, tell us who you are, what qualifications you have and why your advice is superior to everyone else on this blog. The internet makes it easy for cowards to hide behind words.
My fiance has had his head in the sand about his own finances for years. And he too would willingly eat bugs instead of learn. He’s slowly coming around, but trust me, it’s not gender specific.
Oh, and another anecdote? My ex didn’t have a 401k because the loan terms were bad. Yes, you read that right.
Good for you Claire– all I really pay attention to is the fees and my gut feeling. If I can sleep at night, I’m fine. If I can’t my investments need to be slightly less risky.
I’m blessed with a mathematical mind and a love of money. I took the first course to become a registered financial planner when I was in my 20s and while I didn’t pursue that career, it has made our personal situation something to envy.
But that doesn’t mean that the “I’d rather eat a bug…” comment didn’t resonate with me. Just because I know what to do, doesn’t mean I take the time to take all the steps to do it.
Investment stuff can be complicated and overwhelming. There’s paperwork, time delays on transfers and ever changing tax regulations.
For myself, ADD and definitely snowed under with paperwork, there are days when I’d truly rather eat a bug!
Give yourself a pat on the back, Claire, by exposing yourself through this blog, you’ve found a way to make yourself do a lot of the yucky accountability stuff that many of us put off until it is too late. One thing I kept thinking while my eyes were glazing over with the descriptions of your 401Ks etc, was “Because she restructured the debts she’ll have over $20K more to put into her retirement savings at some point in the future.” These steps you are taking will make a HUGE difference in your future. WTGG!
I’m a very money-minded person working in the tax research field. I love details, minutia, and everything personal finance related.
That said, my 401k is in a target fund and I don’t have the slightest clue what kindd of fees I’m charged. My personal Roth is with the investment company my parents used because it was set up when I was younger. Am I getting screwed by high fees? Maybe, but I’d like to think probably not.
The reality is that there is only so much minutia this mind can take. Am I a horrible person for deciding that I’m drawing the line at my investments? Heck NO. If investments were so easy, then why would people be paid very nice salaries to manage them?
Before today the only thing I have ever seen “Another Reader” post is, “You are an idiot” and “women are so stupid.” So I take the above comment with a grain of salt. Yes, I delete abusive and non-helpful comments.
First time here and I’ve gotta commend you. At least you are taking positive action and not just sitting around and saying woa is me.
Taking action, no matter how small is a step in the right direction.
By the way…..I know alot of people who would love to have the savings that you have.
Good stuff and keep it up
Thank you Kurt! It isn’t easy but it has already made such a difference in how I live my life. Accountability is a very good thing.
It sounds like your doing a great job planning everything out. I find myself learning more and more each time I revisit my investments and researching new ideas as well.
Best wishes and thanks for the great insight.
Tina