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Divorced Wednesday? Guess not.

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I received an email from Steve’s lawyer this morning.  Steve has postponed the “agreed prove up” hearing set for tomorrow and has “dismissed” the lawyer.  The lawyer relayed that Steve mentioned getting in touch with me directly for additional information. 

This sort of behavior from Steve used to cause me to go into a frenzy of “What was the trigger?  What did I do?  What didn’t I do?  What did I say?  What didn’t I say?”  Good news is I’m on the other side and I no longer seek some sort of rational explanation for his behavior, because there is none.

I’m certainly frustrated but also know this cannot go on forever.  This too shall pass.  The final hearing is set for December 19 and while he could seek a continuance at that time, with nothing to argue about I cannot see a Judge granting an extension.  Even if it is continued, we will be okay.


10 Comments

  • Reply Beth |

    Sorry to hear the news. December 19th will be here before you know it. Hope you have a Happy Thanksgiving.

  • Reply Stephanie |

    I am new to this blog, and therefore new to your situation. In reading just the past few blogs you’ve posted, I wonder if you could share what triggered your divorce? I’m sure it may be in past blogs, but that is too much work…lol. Thank you.

    • Reply Claire |

      Hi Stephanie–that’s a very big question for me to try to answer but I will indeed try. My divorce was triggered by a husband who duped me and could no longer keep up the charade. I know that many “exes” say something like this about their ex-spouse but Steve said this to me as he left. He apologized for not being who I thought he was. Now that is certainly oversimplifying the situation but, in short, Steve wrote a phenomenal comment on this blog praising me beyond the stars and the moon and then went behind my back just 5 days later and signed a lease at an apartment using joint funds and moved out with 12 hours notice. So that should tell you a lot I think. I don’t know what the actual trigger was but I do know that it had very little to do with me. I hope that helps!

  • Reply Joane |

    I have not commented before, but I am driven to do so now. This has been a challenging year for you; the delay in your divorce is heart-wrenching, but hang in there. And I want you to know that I am filled with admiration. To all who judge you harshly for spending a few bucks on yoga to keep your sanity, I say – back off! I have been in her shoes, and I admire Claire for choosing a healthy way of dealing with this stress. This is life; please show kindness and understanding. Claire, you are learning fiscal discipline and sharing that with us. Thank you. You help keep me on the right path. I hope you have a peaceful, loving Thanksgiving.

    • Reply Claire |

      Thank you Joane! I’m glad you commented. Your comment about choosing a healthy way to handle all of this stress reminded me of a funny comment made at the beginning of my divorce process. I shared that finding healthy things to throw myself into was certainly better than the idea of smoking crack cocaine instead. A reader commented that crack cocaine would have definitely been bad for the budget so good thing I didn’t go that route. That silly comment has come to mind many times in the last three months! LOL! Perspective people! I’m doing flipping yoga instead of spending a lot of money on booze and drugs! 😉 Give me a break!!!

    • Reply Claire |

      No more ruined any day because of this man! Too many days have already been ruined. Thanks for the support Vicki!

  • Reply T'Pol |

    Happy Thanksgiving Claire!

    I really can’t wait to learn about Steve’s motivation to postpone the hearing and dismissing his lawyer if you decide to share with us at the end. I am glad you are handling it well because to tell you the truth, I am frustrated from 5,000 miles away!

    • Reply Claire |

      Happy Thanksgiving T’Pol. I’m pretty sure I will never understand the thought process behind his decision so I no longer even ask myself that. If he does dislose his reasoning though, I’ll definitely share!

So, what do you think ?