by Ashley
That moment when you “like” Blogging Away Debt on Facebook and it pops up in your news feed along with your latest post. And then all your friends and family are alerted to the blogs’ presence, read the latest posts, and post comments on your Facebook wall about it.
Shiz just got real. Like, REALLY real.
*face-palm*
I have to say – baring your financial soul is a lot easier when the readers are “unknown” and you feel some anonymity. Things become more personal when your high school best friend, mother-in-law, and everyone in between has become alerted to the blogs’ presence.
So, I guess I was just “outed” in a sense. Is this what it feels like? Oh, the terror!
Excuse me while I slink into the shadows and wait until Friday. Maybe my “real life” friends and family will forget this ever happened? Yikes!
Hi, I’m Ashley! Arizonan on paper, Texan at heart. Lover of running, blogging, and all things cheeeeese. Freshly 40, married mother of two, working in academia. Trying to finally (finally!) pay off that ridiculous 6-digit student loan debt!
Oh boy, that was the biggest reason I decided to blog about my own debt situation anonymously… but it turns out that the more I let my close friends and family know about my situation the more support and understanding I receive from them! You may feel totally uncomfortable right now but you are doing a very brave thing to tackle your debt publicly and you might even find that you have friends and family in the same sort of debt and can share the journey with you!
You make a good point. I even remember Emily blogging about her experience when Adam and Emily shared their debt situation with their family. I have talked to my family in general terms a bit about our debt, but NEVER with exact numbers attached. And I’ve NEVER had “that” conversation with friends (they know we’re trying to live on a budget and all, but have/had no idea about the scope of our debt situation). I don’t know why it feels so uncomfortable….but its definitely like being caught naked in public!
I can imagine the feeling but that will make any future “ackward” conversations easier. You guys are doing great and can hold your heads high for taking action now rather than ignoring the situation and maybe even inspire some of your family and friends to share their own financial struggles. It would probably amaze you to know the many people you are close to that have the same struggles and are ashamed to let it be known. Now you may be used as encouragment to someone else.
Agreed!
Oh man! I can’t imagine, but maybe I should work on imagining that happening. I have a feeling my friends and family are going to find my blog sooner or later…
There are probably more than a few who are so grateful to know they’re not alone. There’s nothing for you to be ashamed of or feel awkward about. You have debt. You’re owning it and working on it. That makes you a responsible adult. Go on with your bad self!
Lol, loved this comment! Thanks for the encouragement!
And at least word got out AFTER you’d paid off the credit cards. And that you did it so quickly by buckling down is impressive. Just frame it as you are becoming a good example.
Good point. It’s all about perspective!
Saving all my comments for one post…Congrats on paying off that credit card debt! That is amazing! Be sure to reward yourselves for a job well done!
As for what’s next, I’d do the medical/license fees, then car and then start retirement when you get to the student loans. You had a lot of great suggestions in the comments.
As for the family, while I am sure it may be embarrassing, I think it will be easier now that everyone knows. Hang in there. You are doing great.
If you inspire even one person of your friends and family to face the music on their debt, then hopefully the complete embarassment will be worth it?
That said…omg….I can’t even imagine…
I know, right? I’m half-way blocking it out of my mind and pretending it never happened just so I don’t keep obsessing over it! lol
Yeah, I started blogging about my journey about a month ago (when I realized I had paid off $25K of my debt in 9 months) on my way to paying off $151K total. And I have been blogging anonymously to prevent the very thing you mentioned happening. Actually, the real reason is not so much that I don’t want my friends and family to know (many US-based friends are also carrying some big student loan debt) but rather because in my culture we were taught to not share details of our personal lives outside our immediate family. I can see myself revealing my real name in the future, maybe when I hit a big milestone, but for now I think I will continue anonymously!
i totally understand being mortified. but take heart, your journey is a giant success so far. also, i was surprised at people’s reactions. they mostly thought that getting out of debt was a very worthwhile goal and everyone was very supportive. I suspect that some were secretly wishing they were on the same journey.
Thanks! It’s good to hear it worked out well for others who have been there!