by Hope
To sum up what’s happened in the last two weeks I offer this quote: “The best laid plans of mice and men often go astray.”
In actuality so much has happened in just the past week that I cannot wrap my mind around putting it out there succinctly. So today you will be getting a multi-part story broken up into bite size pieces so we are all on the same page on what’s coming next. And all this while I’m still trying to figure out what comes next. So here goes…
I went to Texas. I had a great visit with my family, saw all four of my siblings and my nephew. It was a eleven day stay. On the morning of the 10th day, my dad and I took the time to talk.
I started with an apology for my financial position, owning all of the decisions which have led me to this place.
I thanked him for his selfless generosity in helping me get into a home four years ago when our lives were in such chaos. (You can read that story here.)
And then I told him my decision to NOT buy the house from him.
And then I told him my plan to live here through Christmas as we have been, and then do everything needed to get the house on the market for the spring.
You can probably tell from the opening of this post, that my plans definitely did not meet with his plans, but before I spell all that out later today stay tuned for the next post going up in a couple of hours that lays out my decision to buy my home.
Hope is a creative, solutions-focused business manager helping clients grow their business and work more efficiently by leveraging expertise in project management, digital marketing, & tech solutions. She’s recently become an empty nester as her 5 foster/adoptive kids have spread their wings. She lives with her 3 dogs in a small town in NE Georgia and prefers the mountains to the beaches any day. She struggles with the travel bug and is doing her best to help each of her kids as their finish schooling and become independent (but it’s hard!) She has run her own consulting company for almost twenty years! Hope began sharing her journey with the BAD community in the Spring of 2015 and feels like she has finally in a place to really focus on making wise financial decisions.
Welcome back. Looking forward to reading what’s been going on.
Thanks, Kili!
Good morning. Hanging on my wall is the quote “Plan your life in pencil.”
I’m interested in your dad’s reaction. Does he understand? Agree? Is he proud of you for all that you’ve done, all the work it took to reach your decision?
Mia,
That is an EXCELLENT quote and one I definitely should have learned by now! But alas I haven’t, and curveballs really throw me for a loop. Turns out this is a 5 part story so check back later today to see what has happened thusfar.
~hope
I am confused. You told Dad you are NOT buying the house from him….and plans to put it on the market in the spring. But shouldn’t that be HIS decision if he is the one who owns the house? Then you say at the end of this post stay tuned to hear about your plans to buy your home….is that a DIFFERENT home? Because it sounds like it.
I hope the next piece of the information explains!
I’m kind of confused too. I hope she explains this better in the next snippet of her story.
Hi Mysti and Kayla,
This is the exactly the reason I broke the story up. I couldn’t figure a way to tell it that it would be clear. The house is one in the same. It’s always been “my” house even through it’s in his name. That is his understanding as well as mine.
In the next segment, I try to explain my reasoning for not pursuing the purchase/transfer of title. I’m sure it falls short, but I hope you will start to see my logic.
I guess you have decided to hold off on buying a home before dealing with your debt first or at least a majority of your debt. That may be a wise decision but once again your hard-found stability may fly out the window. You had to move a few times before you could settle in your current home. I wish your dad decides to keep the home as a rental investment and you keep on being a tenant. If you were just by yourself, it would have been easier to downsize drastically and live at some place with a small rent payment but with four kids, that may be very tough. I hope, you will not have to go through what you have gone through once again. Looking forward to the rest of the story…
Hi TPol,
You are right about that. While keeping it could be an option for my dad, I don’t think it was ever his intention to be in the real estate business especially with a one off property so far away from where he lives now. Stay tuned to see what happens.
Welcome Back – it sounds like your discussion did not go over as well as you had hoped. Just remember…you always have to make the decision that is in the best interest of your immediate family. Looking forward to “the rest of the story”.
Hi Mary,
As always, your sense is uncannily accurate. I will describe the remainder of our conversation in part 3 today after trying to explain why I have decided not to pursue the purchase/title transfer of this home.
And in the end, it came down to making what I think is the best decision for me and my kids. Which is hard when there is another family member involved. This probably explains so much of my anxiety before leaving on the trip.
More to come…
Cliff-hanger, Hope! Can’t wait to hear what thoughts went into this decision and where your plans are taking you from here! Hope you had fun and safe travels!
Thanks, Ashley, it’s been fun reading your stories! We did have fun and safe travels with few bumps along the way….
Stay turned for the rest of my seemingly 5 part story for today.